Getting High on Recovery

You may have threatened to destroy the video games, but what take to really do it?

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Parents, what would it take for you to snap and go Darth Vader? Don’t lie to me, you’ve thought about it.

You fantasize about using the Force to crush and destroy, to shoot laser beams and lightening bolts. No, you would not harm to a living being would, you would just go after the inanimate stuff.

First you may need help to accept your inner Darth Vader. To accomplish this, you will want to see my post Parent’s, It’s Time To Accept Your Inner Darth Vader.

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There is no single thing that would make me lose my mind, it’s more of a cumulative thing. How about you: Do you have a Darth Vader list? To inspire you, I will share (confess) my list.

Eleven Things that Make Me Want to Become Darth Vader:

1.  Granola bar boxes, left empty but grinning at me when I open the pantry door
2. Kids arguing over pretty much everything: who argues the most, who left water splashed all over the sink after brushing their teeth and who left the three day old sandwich in the fridge
3. Cereal boxes left defiantly in the cupboard like the left over husks from yesterday’s corn
4. Chores quickly done and half-assed
5. Little hairs left in the sink
6. Milk jugs tucked inside the fridge with nothing inside but foamy air bubbles
7. Fighting to have the last the last word with snarky comments
8. Socks left on the kitchen table
9. A solo ice cream container, empty if not for the stale air and my son’s DNA trail
10. Pee drips left on the toilet seat like little yellow bombs just waiting for an unsuspecting butt

You get the picture. I need help.

11. These things are annoying, but my worst Death-Star moments arise from what I call The Video Game Vaping Syndrome (Empty smoky eyes arising from spending so much time with electronic games that the participant loses their entire soul).

Why does my Darth Vader want to use the Force to against the video games?

My Darth Vader becomes upset because when my kids turn on the screens, their minds leave the room. I try to talk with them and they are gone. My kids have been replaced by strange creatures that moan and slur and react aggressively when anything gets between them and their screens.

I have fantasized and I have threatened to sledgehammer the video game equipment. This dad was tired of threatening. You can see the Darth Vader in his eyes. (Note, audio may be poor or non-existent because Darth Vader destroyed it).

This dad is badass. He did not stop hammering until the job was done. The Force is strong with him.

My favorite part of the video is what the dad is wearing. Sledgehammers go with anything, even your comfy sweats and happy teddy bear sweatshirt.

Parents, remember that your Darth Vader feels best when he is accompanied by a sledgehammer and your best teddy bear sweats.

Keep It Real and May the Force Be With You!

I am an Editor at The Good Men Project. You can find all of my GMP content by clicking here.

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Photo by JD Hancock