Getting High on Recovery

Could there be a pill that will provide you with INSTANT CONFIDENCE, a RISE IN STRENGTH and an INCREASE IN STATURE?

Beginning today there is such a pill. Pfizer has now released a success oriented pill with the trade name VIAGRA-PRO. VIAGRA-PRO is available immediately and has the following benefits:

• CONFIDENT POSTURE that powerfully communicates, “Follow me, because I know that I am important and I have nice shoes.”
• INCREASED ABILITY TO ANSWER MEDIA QUESTIONS.

Marshawn Lynch before VIAGRA-PRO:

 

Marshawn Lynch after taking VIAGRA-PRO:

• IMPROVED ABILITY TO USE INTELLIGENT WORDS in a sentence such as Stimulus Package, Incumbent, Cost Effectiveness.

Testimonial: Former US President George Bush Jr.

“Because of VIAGRA-PRO, I made the following intelligent statementizations while I was in office:

“They misunderestimated me”

“Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.”

• SCORES OF WILLING CITIZENS, STAFF AND COLLEAGUES WILL BE MORE WILLING TO LISTEN TO AND FOLLOW YOUR LEAD NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY.

Testimonial: Former Canadian Prime Minster, Jean Chretien.

“VIAGRA-PRO is Pro-Quebec, Pro-Canada, Pro-Life and Pro-Fessional! VIAGRA-PRO improved my ability to crowd speak and gave me what I needed to lead Canada even after I said this:

“A proof is proof. What kind of a proof? It’s a proof. A proof is a proof and when you have a good proof it’s because it’s proven.”

• FASTER ACCESS TO AN ALREADY LIMITED BRAIN CAPACITY.

Testimonial: Donald Rumsfeld, former US Secretary of Defense

“VIAGRA-PRO took my political life to the next level.”

While using VIAGRA-PRO, Mr. Rumsfeld famously said:

“There are known knowns. There are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don’t know we don’t know.”

 

VIAGRA-PRO contains an active ingredient that makes use of the Leadership-Placebo-Effect. VIAGRA-PRO is guaranteed to make you feel:

• 21% WITTIER. You will be so funny that you will entertain yourself with ease.
• 25% MORE INTELLIGENT. You will feel like you are the smartest person in the room, especially when you are all by yourself.
• 38% MORE CONFIDENT IN YOUR ABILITY TO CREATE A LEGACY THAN YOU REALLY ARE. You will have a legacy and you will be gassy (Gas is one of the unfortunate side effects. Refer to disclaimer).

AN INCREASE IN FRIENDS AND FANS AWAITS YOU

You will become your own #1 Fan when you take VIAGRA-PRO. You may even become so popular that you will want to Friend yourself! VIAGRA-PRO will create STRONG AND IRRATIONAL BELIEFS within you. Beliefs such as being convinced that a certain place like Parliament Hill or Capital Hill or your office will make you special and important; or you may believe that your title will make you more important and more worthy of adoration than the little people.

VIAGRA-PRO can cause the following side effects:

• OVERCONFIDENCE along with the belief that people will do anything you say.
• SUDDEN LOSS IN YOUR ABILITY TO HEAR what staff or colleagues are saying to you. This may or may not be combined with dry mouth.
• AN INVOLUNTARY “WINKING” EYE, usually the Right eye.
• A DECREASE IN ATTENTION TO WHAT REALLY MATTERS, often coupled with an itchy left buttock.
• GASSY and definitely not CLASSY. We apologize, but there is nothing we could do about this.

FOLLOW THIS BLOG to start saving on your first trial of VIAGRA-PRO and to join the next generation of really good leaders.

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