Why is it that we can change our minds in an instant, but it takes a lifetime to change our habits?
___
Change. Everyone seems to be talking about change right now. Honestly, I’m kinda sick of thinking about it. Change is so hard. Even babies cry when they change, so you and I should feel a little better. Why put so much work into it if we just end up sad and crying?
◊♦◊
If you are like me, you have some goals for the year. I like to set themes rather than goals. If you are curious about themes, you can learn more about themes by clicking here. I have twelve life themes, but I will share just one. I hope this leaves you in suspense. Or maybe you will just yawn, because reading other people’s narcissistic goal lists can be boring.
This one is my #12. It is the most important: Make your mistakes and say sorry. Celebrate being wrong.
If I could only pick one this year, this sums it all up. Live, risk, make mistakes, say sorry, learn from it and then celebrate. If I manage to just that in 2016, I will have a damned good year.
Change Your Mind and Mind Your Change
Change is not something that we have a lot of control over. We can move towards change, we can slowly change, but then as soon as we slip we can fall back all the way to the start. We can change, but staying changed is a whole other thing.
Scientists say that habits get moved into the old part of the brain, the automatic part. Changing that part is difficult because it’s like a vault and no one knows the combination. I guess that’s why we need to bribe it with Cheesecake and Chocolate.
|
Habits seem to have a mind of their own. It’s like we have a change mind and a deeper habit mind. Scientists say that’s because habits get moved into the old part of the brain, the automatic part. Changing that part is difficult because it’s like a vault and no one knows the combination. I guess that’s why we need to bribe it with Cheesecake and Chocolate.
If changing our minds is so hard, what hope is there? Plenty. We have a lot of control over change: we can change our clothes, change the channel, or change the station. Okay, we can do a little more than that.
The Four Ways to Mind Your Change
1.Minding change is just slowing down.
It is about cutting ourselves some slack and not pushing so hard. That is my problem, thanks for asking. I push myself too hard and then I fall down the mountain. So I am trying something different. Don’t push.
2.Minding change is breathing.
Breathing is both in our control and out of our control. How you breathe can change you. If you let your brain control your breathing, you are at the mercy of a toddler. If you let you mind talk to the toddler, you have a fighting chance at things.
If you want to know more about breathing, just get quiet and listen to your breathing for five minutes. Trust me, it’s damned hard. That one thing should be a goal all by itself. You can also read this article from Forbes magazine.
3.Minding change is listening.
Reflection changes us. Journalling, doodling, thinking engage our minds more deeply.
4.Minding change is being simple.
Complicating things is a way to avoid change. I’m not preaching, it’s more of a confession. Making things complicated is like having a can of tear gas in your pocket.
Simple is about cutting back. I have twelve life themes. I like to complicate things a little (see previous paragraph). Really, my themes are summed up with one theme.
If you keep your goals simple, they have a better chance to get down into the deeper sectors of your brain. The chocolate and cheesecake find it way easier to carry one goal rather than twelve.
Rather than try to change your mind, stop. Mind your change. If you like this idea you need to follow my blog to receive fresh content and a fresh perspective on mental health, leadership and relationships.
Keep it Real
◊♦◊
I am an author at The Good Men Project and The Real Edition. You can follow my writing by signing up for this blog or on Facebook. If you like what I have to say, please share it.
For exclusive Good Men Project content, including ebooks, webinars on writing, editing and building an online presence, and other content click on the GMP link below. And because you are a reader of my blog, you will receive a 10% discount, which is about two bucks.
Photos by Peter Dutton and smswaby